Because I woke up at dawn
and the mist was dancing,
later with a hidden silver sun
and the mountains disappearing.
Because I needed a day of reflection
after all the colours.
Because I did not know.
Thought about difference and between.
between
you and me
asleep amd awake
you and your shadow
alive and dead
old and young
child and adult
knowing and not knowing
stillness and moving
you and the air around
a desire and a dream
breathing and sighing
flying and falling
falling and floating
being here and being there.
Juno thought up a drawing game. We
took turns to choose something to draw
and we then drew the same thing. e.g
Kat asked juno about himself and his shadow
I block the sun, so there comes a black mark where
no light comes. Its the same shape as me but no details,
a type of mirror, an outline of me. It can disappear. I can’t.
Aaah, but you cannot cover my shadow, even with a
towel or sand you can still see it. If the sun stays out.
Kat asks juno, about ghosts
No, they don’t exist…well, maybe a mind that is still alive
but doesn’t have a body.
Kat asks Juno the difference between alive and dead.
Ugh? Well, I’m always there until I’m dead and then I’m
still there but down in the ground or in a pot as ashes.
So we just checked each others breathing, heart beat
and pulse. It really confirmed I was alive, that juno was
alive, that we were alive in that moment, in that action
in that place, together. An encounter, so simple.
At the end of the day, we walked through the alleys
of San Sebastian and got a great jumpy energy running
down the steps. We both said when for us we felt
it was twilight. I had a feeling of things falling in on
me, always that moment when I feel heavy.
Juno felt his dusk a minute later. In the beautiful entrance
of the studio we played a dusky music. Juno on
mouth organ, very soulful and ghostly and
I was moved to move. A shared twilight event.
